How to Make Your Wedding a True Family Affair

Step 1 :
Sit down with your partner and make a list of important family traditions you can incorporate into different aspects of your wedding day or pre-wedding day preparations and ceremonies. Ask elder family members if certain flowers, colors, or ornaments have significant meaning or value to your family. Think creatively about family traditions that will add a sense of familiarity and warmth to your wedding day. Find ways to include these traditions in a fun, creative and memorable way! Try to use significant traditions that include siblings, best friends, and grandparents.

Step 2 :
Assign two to three family members to work with the catering company to design an appropriate menu for your wedding day. Impress upon these family members the importance of selecting several key food, wine and dessert varieties that appeal to the greater family dynamic. You can even provide family recipes to help the decision making process. (If you do not want to give executive control to a third party, explain that although you will consider the suggested menu very closely, you also reserve the right to make any changes or modifications you feel are necessary to enhance the menu and satisfy the greatest number of people.)

Step 3 :
Make a song list that includes songs that are especially important to your family, your partner and yourself. Think about songs that were played when your parents or siblings wed, a song playing on the radio in the car on your way to your college graduation ceremony, a song that best describes your partner, a favorite song you sing along to with your best friend, etc. Try to compile a song list that creates a sense of emotion, nostalgia and sentiment. (Aim for songs that will recreate positive shared moments you have shared with the ones you love!)

Step 4 :
Divide tasks among family members. Ask a parent or close sibling to read a passage from your family's religious text, an old love letter, or a favorite poem. Have a younger niece or nephew recite several funny family antedotes. These recitations will inspire unity and connection amongst your guests. Also, having a parent or sibling perform special reading(s) that hold significant meaning for you and your family will allow the wedding to serve as a a celebration of family tradition, values and themes.

Step 5 :
Study video footage from your parents, siblings and other family member's wedding day events. Try to incorporate small ideas that, together with your own unique vision of your wedding day, will create a memorable wedding for you, your partner and your family. Also, consider if you can wear your mother's wedding dress, fly in family members who are not in town, have creative family members help you (or the wedding planner) decide on key decorations, make a memory book of the day for family members to receive in the mail after the ceremony, mix the bride and groom family when organizing the seating chart, ask family members to record special video messages on the day and distribute later as part of a video diary of the wedding, or plan a big family dinner prior to the wedding (separate from the rehearsal dinner). Incorporating all, or just a few, of these tips will help to make your wedding a true family affair!